Wednesday, November 5, 2008

The Grocery Cart Story

After all that depressing talk about the Holidays, and the elections which are OVER by the way so enough media for the love of all things, I figured you needed a funny...

Without further ado, the shopping cart story.

It started like any other evening...I picked up Max from daycare and headed home. And then I remembered that I had to feed my dog cheerios the night before because we were out of dog food.

NO LIE on the cheerios...Deuce loved them.

Anyways, I changed my route and headed to Target, Max strapped into his carseat behind me. I peeked back and him and he was O-U-T. In case you weren't aware Max is NOT a sleeper. He prefers to live his life playing, eating, and playing some more until he crashes into a self induced traumatic meltdown that concludes with a brief catnap. Just enough to refresh for a few more hours of play, eat, play.

Normally, I would forgo the lure of Target. But really, my 70 pound chocolate lab cannot continue to live on cheerios. I had to get dog food! As I pulled into the parking lot I cursed my plight as a military mommy. If Rob were home I could give him a call and ask him to pick up the dog food, or I could head home and drop off the baby and go to Target alone, or I could run out later after Max was in bed and Rob hung out playing WOW. So many options not available to this military mommy.

As I pulled Max out of his carseat, he stayed asleep. This is abnormal for the King of Catnaps but whatever. I walked into the store and got a basket, all the while holding my 25 pound monster in one arm. My forearm ached as I headed to the back of the store. And then I reached the pet aisle and looked back and forth from my child, to my cart, to the 30 pound bag of dog food I was buying. Crap!

Suddenly, I had a brilliant idea. I spotted the dog beds, they sure looked comfy. I wonder...if I put this here little dog bed in my cart and ever so gently laid down my child I could at least grab the dog food before he awoke in a rage at the injustice of being dragged to Target after such a long day at daycare.

I slipped the dog bed into the cart. I smushed it down. I ever so gently laid my sleeping child onto the bed, holding my breath for just a few moments of quiet to grab the food and run.

He stayed asleep. In my shopping cart, on a dog bed. In Target.

I grabbed the food and put it underneath. I stood there for a moment laughing. I took a picture. I thought, "I am so blogging about this" and I waited.


So like any smart momma I started shopping. People gave me funny looks, they couldn't decide if I was the smartest woman alive or if they should call CPS on me. 30 minutes later, he awoke, in a rage at the injustice of being dragged to Target after such a long day at daycare.

We checked out, we headed home but I couldnt stop giggling at the thought of my monster conked out, in a shopping cart, on a dog bed, in Target.


Jen said...

So funny! Evie has done that before in the store!

it's me, just me, nothing fancy, just simple me said...

oh the brilliant things we do when limited with just two hands and a husband thousands of miles away. i love the story and the pic!